Oh my… It sure feels good to write from the heart again.
I know… I know… This is my first 2013 post (with good reason) and some of you are probably thinking, what kind of blogger is this? FAKE much??? Well, here is a royal #KeepCalmDzarling to you, because some of us had dead skin to shed! 2012 was a rough year for me, major decisions had to be made and were made. I refuse to live in a permanent state of never-ending emotional and mental struggles (I wont go into much detail), but I will say this much. My healing process required that I temporarily remove myself from Social Media as well as my social life and do what I do best, shut the world out , face my sh!t head-on and deal with it! which I did! I spent time with ME and fell in love with the company I kept…
I think I kinda went all Nam-myoho-renge-kyo-come-Eat-Pray-Love on myself. Can’t be too sure though, because there was a whole lot of meditating and eating, and a lot less lurvin’ and praying taking place. I also chopped my hair 2cm short and went platinum blond, the peroxide went Houdini on my hairline bebe and made me look like a cross between the screaming and angry Grace Jones! And I did not give a rats toe! I even flew to Kenya, Nairobi alone for some Me Time and to catch Erykah Badu in concert and of course search for my Maasai man to take a picture with <-(That’s my truth and I’m sticking to it!). I thought I’d find his two meter plus piece of yummy brown-skinned, bony warrior self standing stretched, gracious and aloof on one leg, with his other leg bent, foot digging into his inner thigh for balance, with his knee and upper thigh protruding and showing the right amount of skin and raw muscle out the slit-like opening of his red/blue/yellow checked Maasai kikoi, his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes staring into a far off land waiting for me. AH! Instead I found him in a souvenir shop, both feet on the ground and was a mere +/- 1.60m short! mxxm! I had a good time non-the-less.
Still on last year… I heard about a place called Arts On Main, in Maboneng precinct downtown Jozi not far from Kwa Mai Mai. My curiosity decided to set aside a Sunday and shuttle to that part of town. I fell in love with the vibe there, especially The Rooftop Salsa, It spoke to the diverse, easy-going, lets dance part of me. I went back again and again and again and it soon became my Sunday eye candy watching hang-out spot. There were a group of regular pleasant dancers (strangers to me at the time) I had spotted on the dance floor dancing a sensual dance I HAD TO LEARN in addition to Salsa and some routine we could all join in, led by a certain gentleman (unknown to me at the time too). I later learnt that, that captivatingly sensual, romantic, flowy, and beautiful to watch dance is called Kizomba and originates from Angola (I’ll go into more detail in the coming blogs) and those pleasant dancers I saw dancing were actually the BailaAfrika family I’d get introduced to and later be part of, not forgetting learn KIZOMBA from. And they, BailaAfrika were/are the life of the Arts On Main Rooftop Salsa place, because on days they did not attend, the place became yet another nice spot to hangout but their mmmm… ‘je ne sais quoi’ was definitely missing in action. And that is my non-biased honest opinion!
[September ’12: That’s awesome Ed in yellow dancing with his wife Sexy Tash; The ever so well-dressed Patrice in Navy dancing with the funniest Chinese woman I’ve ever met Chloe; The rest? Random people I don’t know]
[September ’12: Patrice in Navy shorts and long-sleeved T and our resident BailaAfrika Dj, Serghino in a blue/white check shirt]
I also thought to brave my shyness and take my poetry to the stage via the Open Mic sessions at the POPART theatre in Maboneng Precinct. I LOVE IT!!! YOLO baby!
I continue to write outside my blog…
My choice of music would probably put my peers to sleep. I am certainly an old Soul in that regard. My Soul needs an oasis of serenity to survive and thus my music should complement.
Cooking is to me what a full-day Spa is to some women!
I read a lot…
Keeping fit is a necessity not an option!
BailaAfrika Family for a weekly Kizomba and Salsa fix. Truth be told…. I dance Kizomba and watch Salsa but only mess about when tipsy. Catch them on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bailaafrika
The Corporate Cafe is Home to BailaAfrika’s Kizomba (Tuesday) and Salsa (Wednesday) evening classes. Perfect mid-week Friday I tell ya!!!!
I have learnt that it is rather important to keep oneself and mind occupied with things, activities and people who excite you, less you want to indulge in idle-mind warfare. Also, giving birth to a new self comes with its fair share of reshuffling, repositioning self, prioritizing, as well as to mentally and emotionally compartmentalize people and things that matter most, matter least and those that do not matter at all. Not everybody is destined to continue your journey with you, and at times you must learn to let go of those people and things that no longer serve you positively. I believe people come into my life for a season, a reason, or a lifetime and I know just what to do with each one. unfortunately and fortunately I have had to let go of a few and feel a few more drifting away and that is OK, because if you hang on too long to that dried up season that no longer provides a reason to hang-on to making our union less worthwhile, bitterness surely prevails and I can’t have none of that! So when the season runs dry then adios amigo, andele! andele! Go and light up someone’s life and I will do the same, that way we can preserve the goodness of what we shared, to meet in the future in high spirits for another. What-to-do? Such is life! You gain some and you lose some.
I am in a very good space in my life right now, a place I want to preserve for many years to come. I am truly loving the new unfolding me, well not really new, just a calmer, happier, at peace, less angry, less bitter and less edgy revamped self. This woman is walking in her own pace, with no urge to compete, no urge to be mean, almost unguarded for which she is learning to let-go. Her heart is still manned with the toughest security money can buy, but the high wall is coming down, one brick at a time. She speaks her mind respectfully and diplomacy is her middle name, though still keeps her sarcasm for laughter-sake, She is still shy yet not shy enough to bow down to intimidation and she sure as hell knows her bottom line. Soooo much has happened to me over the years and Soooo much more is happening *you should see this huge smile on this madam’s face right now*
In closing, I am and will always be me; bubbly, funny, silly, opinionated, naughty and vocal. But when it comes time to step out of that playful field and step into the field where protecting myself and my heart are concerned, I get a little more serious, a bit more dedicated, and NOBODY stands in my way! So, for all the crap I had to endure… Well… Like the Arabs would say. Khallas! Mafi mushkilla!
And like the rest of us say…
With or without you!
Self-Love Warrior 😉