PUMI'S blog…

I Got A Little Better

I think I am ready to share this…

See…

Little did he know 

My embryo be lyrically cursed

Blessed with skill

To make one travel

With my spoken audio

 

Like that time I forewarned

My mind to divorce me

When I was forcibly laid

At sixteen

He may have hit the home-run

I could not run home for

 

Or the time 

I was shown third base

Before I got to third grade

By the one 

Who’s bloodline

Runs in mine

 

Lost and faulted

most times…

fought and abused

Lost whole-some-ness

To this wrestles wondering Soul

 

Reality ridden

Love hidden

Trust ex-ci-sion-ed

Nomad at heart

 

Heart became bitter

With every after thought jitter

And 

With every bold silent 

Confident confession of guilt

 

See…

Vulnerability is a painful road less travelled 

A personal revelation of scares unraveled 

A Section of lives damaged

of stories untold

 

Though life unfolds

Pride circumcised 

Fore-skin of self respect compromised

Soul-fullness colonized

 

See..

Selected truths deny Spirits their forgiveness

Giving birth to sleepless nights

Of guilty convictions

Crippling Mountain moving mustard seedlings

feeling lost, forgotten

And faulted for days

 

See.. 

Vulnerability is a beautiful road when travelled

It is what scars are to that lesson

What a mess is to that message

What truth is to Honesty

What Love is to my children (Thando and Lerato)

 

Lyrically cursed

Broken and put together head first

Embracing feelings of celibate obedience

Neglecting addictions of deaths ingredients

With everyday…

I got a little better

 

With the need for LOVE

This woman

This mother

This wife

This lover

That child

This heart

This me

That you

This love

 

This love makes it easier to forgive…

That him

That you

That beast

That dick

Dick head  

You all

 

Love is my source

My life

My home

My heart

This heart

Your now

My how?

My need

 

My need for life

This life

This breath

My breath

This warmth

That smile

My smile

 

And soon you forget

You hold

You love

You want

You embrace

And make love

You respect

Yourself again

 

You respect this woman

This wife

This sister

This daughter

This skin

This lover

This you

That you

 

No longer in third grade

But in 1… 2… 3… 4….

My fourth decade of life

Where third base now leads

To that home-run 

I no longer need to run home for…

 

I SMILE

And when I do, I…

Spread

My

Internal

Love

Externally

And that is no illusion.

This entry was published on April 9, 2013 at 22:45 and is filed under Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

2 thoughts on “I Got A Little Better

  1. Thandeka on said:

    ..Forgiveness. Life. Love. Respect!

    ..I’m glad you shared this. I’m glad you wrote this. I pray U don’t feel any pain when thinking about “that You”

    ..God bless and continue to heal U Mpumi!

    • Live. Love. Laugh. Forgive.
      I’m glad I wrote it
      I had to write it
      to release…
      ‘That me’? is a past of me, a reality in my now, She is not me right now. she cant be, there is no place for her. However, I embrace her and take care of her for she keeps ‘This me” smiling. No pain in that. none whatsoever.

      Thank you for reading.

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