PUMI'S blog…

I want a crucifixion type love…

I had an emotionally rough past two days,  OK let me be frank, ROUGH is an understatement. It was intense my bra, in a  freaken AAAARRRRGGG I CHOPPED MY HAIR OFF!!!  kind of way! YHO!  You know, when good decisions are made for the right reasons to the wrong person kind of thing?! Anyway, true to my being I’ve bounced back short hair and all :’D… “Zey dontz call me dzie ghard for nosssing” Baby! I have that Warrior not Worrier attitude as part of my DNA ensuring that I never stay down for too long… I GOT KIDS dammit!

I received a  God sent voice note via BBM at 07:06  this morning from a loving friend ‘Charity Paballo Mohlamme’ (she knew nothing of the self-induced emotional drama I endured) … So this time around, the right thing was happening to the right person for the right reasons, you feel me???


She (Charity) typed: “I still believe in LOVE”

I replied: “Me too chomie. Can’t open file, will make space in a moment… We  still on for Sunday akere?”

Charity: “Pls pls pls… Make space you wont regret it”

I did just that! downloaded, saved and listened to it, then played it again, I waited for my children to get out of the car (school drop off) I then cried and played it over and over and over…(it is still on repeat). Then the chilling truth dawned on me that this is the kind of love I want, yearned for and am ‘almost’ ready to give. I just could not put it into words thus making it impossible to explain… How did Charity know I needed this message at that very moment to make sense of all this emotional intrusion?

See, I’m a firm believer that a MESS carries power to become that MESSAGE powerful enough to BLESS! So, I took the time, energy and patience to write/type this voice note, with hope that it blesses someone, ANYONE! As much as it blessed and reawakened my deep vision and feelings of what love should, is and could be with the right person, at the right time, for the right reasons based on good decisions and a clear conscience.  Enjoy  😉

“My biggest prayer is to love her right
I want to…
Love her like Christ loved the church
Love her like her Father in Heaven
Loves Her Love her like the Holy Spirit loves her soul
And love her like she was created to be loved

But sometimes….
Sometimes my flesh tries to intimidate me with that kind of love
Its like my spirit cries out from the depths of this corrupted prison
With the voice of abel screaming that
I have not loved her to the extent Christ loves the church
 I want a crucifixion type love

Everytime I hug her I want my arms to be spread out on the cross
And I want to die to my childish ways
Everytime I look into her eyes
I want a crown of thorns to be placed on my head and surrender my thought life to her honor
I want the walks we take in the park
To be nails driven into my feet so that they will lead her with the authority of Moses
 I want a crucifixion type love

I want my side to be pierced every time we laugh together
so that ill always remember that she is my rib
Everytime I sleep and dream of her
I want my back to be beaten with a catonine tails
so that I’ll always carry her burdens for her
Everytime I’m not with her
I want to stand before pilate and stand true to my relationship with her
I want those who have seen me to have seen her in ME when we are apart
 I want a crucifixion type love

I want a love that will cause dead men to rise
When people gaze on us, they want to know who is this Christ that we speak of
Everytime she falls I want to take her in my arms like my cross and carry her up to calvary
I want men to mock me for not wanting to be like them
For not wanting to squander my love on various women
But to have the passion to pour out my love onto one soul for all of eternity
 I want a crucifixion type love

I want a love that was predestined before eternity
I want a love that was birthed in my mother’s womb
I want a love that is willing to give up this world for her
I want a love that is immaculate
I want a love that makes the angel’s wish they were in our shoes
I want a love that will make me pray to God and say
 Who am I that YOU are mindful of me to bless me with her
I want a crucifixion type love

I want a love that bleeds purity
I want a love that people will lie on us just to see us split apart
I want a love that will make me run away to a far village,
build a mansion for you with my bare hands
and send you love letters every day reminding you of me
letters that you can keep in a book and spend time reading them every day
I want a love that will make my spirit pray for you
I want a love that will make me walk on water
in the middle of the most dangerous storm for you
 I want a crucifixion type love

I want a love that my friends will betray me because of my affection for you
I want a love that after we’re gone,
that for centuries to come men will aim to follow in our legacy
Everytime I rise in the morning
I want it to be my cross being raised upright for you
To stand on the hill of my life and portray a beautiful sacrifice
I want to be placed into the tomb of your heart
The Tomb that your mother and father built
I want a love that will rise with all power over adversity
 I want a love that people will flock to see if it is real
I want a crucifixion type love

I want a love that shows my yearning for you
I want a love that even when we argue,
I still have a burning passion & desire to be with you
I want a love that heals
The kind of love that covers the wounds that were dug deep by the knives of infidelity and insecurity
I want a love that makes God get up and dance around his throne every time he sets his eyes on us
I want a crucifixion type love

So with all of that said
 Lord, give me the strength to love her like you love me
Like the way you didn’t consider being equal with the Father a thing to be grasped
But you came and gave up your throne for the filth of this world
 And in love, you served In the same way
Let me serve her unconditionally infinitely
Let me MAN UP
And quit wasting time playing games
and pursue her like you pursue your church
Because you have chosen me to be entrusted with her heart
So let me cherish it like a jeweler cherishes a diamond
Let me examine it and find out every minute detail about her worth

I want to love her
like Abraham loved Sarah
Like Isaac loved Rebecca
Like Jacob loved Rachel
Like Boaz loved Ruth
Like Solomon loved his Queen
 I want a crucifixion type love

So into your hands I commit this relationship
Because I want to love her like you Love your church

I WANT a Crucifixion…type…love…

This entry was published on June 21, 2012 at 12:00. It’s filed under Crucifixion kinda love and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

19 thoughts on “I want a crucifixion type love…

  1. Mandla Nkosi on said:

    it is a wonderful message, but it made me felt like we man dont efficiently express our love for women, but its going to be very difficult for any men to give a crucifixion type of love really.

  2. thembile on said:

    This is beautiful my friend. tnx to you and Charity……..

  3. A guy friend of mine sent this to me two days ago and all I could do was cry… Mixed feelings of ‘I’m not sure if this kind of love exists.’ And ‘I refuse to settle for anything less than this type of love’… Since then I’ve made it my morning alarm tone. What a lovely way to be woken up.

  4. Lelo Novukuza on said:

    Iyo sis Mpumi….it feels like you were reading my heart. There is so much I want to say to you but the only things that keeps coming out are the tears rolling down my face. Before reading this, the pain was so deep but it suddenly became my greatest strength. I needed to read this. Thank you…thank you 😥

  5. leza mapitsha on said:

    wow. had no idea there was this kinda love.

  6. Ty Tregallez on said:


    I’m not really a fan of blogs, but I must say, I’m glad I took the time check urs out. I’ve been looking for words to this beautiful poem… Since getting This beautiful poem, I’ve probably listened to it more than 20 times… Within a space of 1 month. It’s unbelievable. I’m a guy but this poem almost brought me to tears… It made me realize that I’m yet to love my woman. I still don’t believe that you’d get such words today…. Brent Rice was definetly guided by GOD when he wrote this.. I mean… This is toooooo awesome! Wow.

    Anyhu, thank you for taking time to type the whole poem for us. God bless you!

    • pumi1 on said:

      I appreciate you taking the time to comment. thank you for stopping by and thank you for your comment too. It is a beautiful poem. 🙂

  7. Bandile on said:

    Hi, kinda stumbled upon your blog and out of curiosity
    Decided to read on. Brent Rice Crucifixion type love,
    I cannot express how this poem touches me, the emotions
    that engulf me, when listening to this divine man speak of
    the kind of love he wants, I’m utterly speechless
    I would think that everyone yearns for such a love but
    truth be told not everyone is mentally and emotionally equipped
    to comprehend with the ideology behind the responsibilities that come
    with such a love. Its a very soulful piece indeed

    • pumi1 on said:

      Hello Bandile,

      It is indeed a one-of-the-kind poem not forgetting tear jacking too! thank you for reading and stumble upon anytime 😉

  8. Dalphine on said:

    I am speechless, My boyfriend sent me this and i was crying and reading it again just makes me cry more omw

  9. Hey there sister, super grateful for you typing out this poem. Thanks so much for sharing it with us. Massive power in these words. Blessings 🙂

  10. neo on said:

    Wow….beautiful. #touched

  11. grace on said:

    now I know the love that I deserve and wont compromise

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