What we think men want in a relationship and what they actually want are two totally different things. We all pretty much want the same things so what is hindering most of us from attaining a ‘perfect relationship’?? I mean the sex is good right? You always see each other, yes? He wants to be with you and you with him, no? Then why is it that the wonderful, warm, romantic, steamy and lusty relationship you once shared has been replaced with resentment, anger, feeling hopeless and frustrated?
It does not have to be that way, both man and woman contribute to relationship failure and since I’m a woman who loves and cares for my fellow sisters… This one is for you 🙂
See, men don’t want superficial women who are too sensitive, manipulative, desperate and clingy.
Be yourself, be confident with a dash of respect, self-sufficient but not the “Destiny’s child Independent woman’ kind, don’t be afraid to communicate your needs boldly, by this I don’t mean you should tell the poor man ‘Baby lets go home, I want to F*** you now!’ from across a dinner table with friends. He may need the Heimlich Maneuver and you may never see him again! Easy does it tiger!
I have learnt through my past relationship hardships that there is no relationship heaven! Relationship success takes a lot of hard work, sweat, tears, a great deal of respect, communication, patience, walking on eggshells, a shit load of sacrifice and sometimes dancing the cha-cha around each other’s personas and feelings to name a few.
Ladies, don’t sabotage your relationship with that ‘new millennium, I don’t need a man, I got this’ independent woman attitude of yours. Humble thyself dzarling before you start-breeding cats as companions!
Now let me share things we women do that drive men bonkers and have the potential to lead to a break-up before I turn into Agony Aunt…!
Men are human too believe it or not, they too get tired of our BS. Only difference is, they don’t go around telling the world about it… they just get another woman!
note: I’m not a relationship guru, neither am I on a mission to save your relationship and NO, no man is paying me to write this. Just consider this my good deed for the day. After all Sharing is caring! But don’t thank me, thank my guy friends 😉
Let’s start with NEVER EVER tell your man you spend more than your monthly car installments on that weave, fake nails and fake eye lashes every month! Just don’t! He’ll snap! Oops did I just….? :p
# Treating him like a kid – He will leave your coy @ss stood there stunned and bewildered on your doorstep so fast, you will be left telling your friends: “He went out to get the paper and never came back” meanwhile he is in the arms of a woman who treats him like the man he is!
# being rude to/disliking his friends – See this is a girl SOBS!!!! *Stuck-On-Being-Stupid* The nicer you are to his friends, the more you hang out with your man DUH? 1+1 is not ‘Catch 22’! Just follow the NO flirting rule and you’ll be fine and remember they are his friends not yours!
# Hacking into his mobile phone – Looking for incriminating text messages and then torturing the poor guy for sending ‘bye 😉’ to his female friend. huh? STOP IT! Is ‘bye ;)’ the new secret code for ‘lets have sex’?
# Sharing intimate bedroom details about your sex life to your girlfriends – When one of your friends runs off with your man don’t be mad and don’t even think of getting even… Thank that big mouth of yours instead!
# Assuming – COMMUNICATE dammit! That’s how you clear any misunderstanding.
# Over-analyzing – The mind is a very dangerous tool when left to wonder so if his phone is off or he is not answering his phone, LEAVE IT AT THAT and get some sleep! all those voicemail messages you’ve left make you look and feel stupid.
# obsessiveness /Jealousy – Slight jealousy is sweet, but being obsessed is tantamount to relationship suicide! You have been warned!
# Giving up too much too soon – Your heart, your mind, money and sex… I know it’s 2012, but come on now lady? Mystery much?
# Believing you can change him – Good luck… you are on your own!
# Being a Drama Queen – In the end that all you’ll have left are your moods, tears, tantrums and no man!
# Confusing Sex with love – Nothing wrong with a short-term fling baby but don’t get your knickers in a twist when you utter ‘I love you’ and he’s runs for the door.
# Being too available – NEVER linger by the phone waiting for him to call unless you want to eat yourself from the inside out *trust me I know only too well*. Also, resist the urge to give up your social life. ALWAYS wait for the invitation and give him space to breath.
# Headaches, backache and any other aches (to avoid s-e-x) – And you wonder why he is with Sandra and not with you?!?!
# Thinking that getting pregnant will mend a broken relationship – That is just plain Evil! Did you ever stop to think that raising a child in a hostile environment is borderline child abuse? And what effect it would have on him or her?
# Not knowing your place as a woman – Women and Men will NEVER be equal, I don’t care if you earn more than him, drive a bigger car, can drill holes in the wall or even walk on the ceiling! A man is the head of the household and a woman is the neck keeping that head in place 😉
# Refusing him sex in the morning – See, he can control every other erection BUT the morning boner. think of it like this, it is natures way of telling you ‘It’s time to get some vitamin S baby’ 😀 shame man, give the poor guy and his little leg a break.
# Never offering to pay, EVER! – Come on now ladies, you can’t expect a man to pay for everything all the time! the least you can do is offer!
# Diluting your sexual power with inhibition is a passion killer of note! If you want ‘some’ say and show that you want some spankyliciousness* don’t just lay there and diminish your sexual needs sista!
#Get over your EX – Give the new man in your life some respect!
To be continued… 😉